that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Randomize
