Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
I smell like Dick and happiness
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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