i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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