the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
