I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
Randomize
