gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
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