New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
honey bunches of taint.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
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