i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize