I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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