please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
