we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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