Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
