Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize