Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Randomize