toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize