At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
Randomize