omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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