I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
Randomize
