We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Randomize
