i don't really know how much tequila is too much
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
Oh god it's open bar.
Randomize
