i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
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