How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
She tied me up with her honor cords...
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
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