so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
