it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
Randomize