Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
We have so much sex to catch up on
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
