D3 body, D1 cock
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
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