in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
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