Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
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