why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
I think we might need a safe word for this...
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
Randomize
