Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize