so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
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