If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
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