they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
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