Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
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