Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
Randomize