Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize
