i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Randomize
