Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
It all started with a game of naked twister.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Randomize
