remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
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