i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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