he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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