She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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