By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Randomize
