if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
They should really pass out barf bags in church
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
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