Whod you bang
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
