I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Randomize
