Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Randomize
