carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
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