a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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