I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
