i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Randomize
