I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
I think a kid would responsible me up
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
Randomize
